Broken day

Hey guys,

just arrived back to the backstage after the signing session in Munich and I want to write quickly something on the spur of the moment.

I want to tell you about tourblues, or tour depression. I’ve experienced after-tour-depression and that one’s still well on its way but this one’s different, it hits you on tour. You could also call it homesickness. We’ve been on the road now for 1,5weeks. It’s not a long time in a man’s life but the amount of great and epic stuff that happens in that time is like a time machine. Right now I feel we’ve been touring for Years.

So, today I woke up suffering the tour blues. You never know when it’s gonna hit you. The last time for me was back in february tour after the Berlin gig. Felt like being alone and taking a looooong shower. Today I’ve been suffering it the whole day. Today I’ve been missing important people back in Finland, my family, and haven’t found the right way in my mind to cherish and appreciate this weird stage of being a nomad for a moment.

And it has made me feel bad, guilty in a way. Here we are, bunch of best friends playing sold out shows after another for people so enthusiastic, people who really get what we’re about musically, and all of a sudden I find it hard to realize how extraordinary thing this is. After all, it’s something the all 5 of us have been striving for over 10 years now. So when you suddenly get hit by the tour blues the day starts to feel like in a song I once wrote:

These days I live in,

the weather is damp and the sky has no color.

Everything, that gets under my skin

feels more distant than before.

 

So that’s the way my day’s been. A tourist in my own weird life.

Until.

The clock strikes 8PM and the start tape of the gig goes live.
I forget everything, and during the show I just feel how the music and singing corrects every single thing in my thought process. Putting everything in order, in the right shape. It feels right and real.

And every single time in my short life, when I’ve felt off or bad, and I’ve had the chance to play a show on the same day, it’s been the same way.

Therefore I know we gave you a good show tonight in Munich.

I felt it from you guys in the audience.

I know we served a purpose,

I know I sang for a reason.

I have no more tour blues.

Thank You for that.

Zürich, see you tomorrow! 😉

Antti